Saturday Book Read w/ Sharine Jones: Ch. 3 Confused & Delusional Contin.

Reflections of A Woman’s Indiscretions

This book is dedicated to my mother Elena, grandmothers Josephine & Evril, & to all the Ladies in my life – Strong women I have seen Prevail no matter the circumstances or challenges.

I don’t know? I wanted to be with Slimm, and trust me when I say that I wasn’t trying to keep Blu in my back pocket for a rainy day. But I knew something was holding me back from moving forward with a divorce. I knew Slimm wasn’t the same person I fell in love with, and yet I still loved him. How I perceived it was Slimm flipped the script on me as soon as I separated from Blu. Therefore, I could only imagine what he would be like once I divorce Blu. That’s how I was thinking back then. I was just a confused mess. All I knew for certain was that it wasn’t time to file for a divorce.
February 2005
      The night before Valentine’s Day was perfect. I picked up some chocolates, candy, and special treats to make Valentine’s Day baggies for my kids’ classmates. I make these special baggies for every Valentine’s Day, which my kids celebrated at school. I enjoyed making them, and they enjoyed sharing them with their classmates. For the first time, these Valentine’s Day treats were made in a hotel room that Slimm surprised me with. When I was done with the baggies, Slimm told me to close my eyes because he had a surprise for me.
      With his hands covering my eyes, he guided me gently to the bathroom. When he drew his hands away, I was speechless. The bathroom was glowing with soft lit candles, the floors and counters were covered with rose petals, and the bathtub was filled with hot water and luxurious bubbles to the brim. It was truly an amazing sight.
      He helped me out of my clothes and I stood there in the nude while he watched me with a smile on his face. He then stepped close to me; he kissed me; and he embraced me. He took my hand [like a member of royalty] and escorted me into the bathtub. He poured me a glass of champagne and I threw my head back feeling completely pampered–I felt utterly relaxed in that heated bathtub. No man has ever done anything like this for me before. The time and thought that he put into this was incredible. I honestly didn’t expect him to surprise me this way. [Of course, I didn’t know what to expect considering our Christmas Eve debacle.]
      I believe Slimm’s acts of love and affection played an immense part on why I loved him–and why I stayed with him. When it was good, it was great. But at the same time, I was compromising myself – that’s how bad I wanted to be loved.
      When I was done, he helped me out of the bathtub, wrapped a towel around my body and said, “Baby get dressed; I’ll be waiting for you.”  He then walked out of the bathroom.
      When he left I then lathered my whole body with body oil, so I can be super smooth and soft for him. I then sprayed myself with the best fragrance, and put on my sexy nightgown, so I can be ready to tempt him. When I walked out of the door, I saw rose petals making a path for me to the bed; and there I saw him with a Blunt and two glasses of champagne. As we sipped on that chilled bubbly, he then gave me my Valentine’s Day gift. I opened the gift-wrapped box, like a kid on Christmas Day, and inside was a gold anklet–delicate and classy, just the way I like my jewelry. I loved it.
       “Awww baby. I love it! Thank you!” I said, as I reached over to kiss his lips.
      Hitting the Blunt and exhaling he said, “This is for you too baby.” Handing me gift number two!
      “Are you serious? You got me two gifts?”  I said, giggling.
      “Yeah baby. I didn’t know which one you’d like and I couldn’t choose between em.’ The sales lady told me to get both – you deserve it.”
      I opened the long rectangular box and found a gold tennis bracelet lined with small diamonds. I was absolutely in awe, that I quickly forgot all the ugly things he ever did up to this point. Perhaps, that was his plan. He was charming and intelligent, after all. Either way, that night was hands down one of the best I have ever shared with Slimm. There was no arguing or fighting; we were at peace.
      But the crazy thing was, even though Slimm gave me a night of bliss, I could not stop thinking of Blu. I did not know if it was a feeling of guilt or if I was missing him–or maybe it was the fact that our wedding anniversary was coming within the week–but bottom line I was confused and I didn’t know what to make of my feelings; especially, since Blu had moved on as well – he had a new girlfriend.
      Stay Tuned Next Week for the End of Chapter of 3
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